goodbyes

Last week I had to say some hard goodbyes.

On Monday I said goodbye to this guy:

And then on Saturday I said goodbye to this girl: 

{This is one of the oldest pictures I have of Kelsey & me. I love it.}

I wish I could have everyone I love with me all the time and we would never have to say goodbye. These goodbyes were bittersweet because my friends are going on to great things and I'm excited for them, but I am missing them like crazy! I still expect that they will be coming back in a couple weeks or a couple months, and I'm not sure when the reality will hit that they aren't coming back.

Saying goodbye to Joe was hard in part because it involved a break-up that certainly didn't feel like a break up. There was lots of crying on my part and lots of reassurance from him that we will still talk and will see each other again. Still I couldn't shake the thought that it could be my last time seeing him, hugging him, kissing him. And that was {still is} pretty heartbreaking. Luckily we have the benefits of modern technology, so it is easy to talk when we are on opposite sides of the country.

Kelsey and I had a fabulous farewell to Provo on Friday night and were able to fit in most of our favorite things. We ate at Spicy Thai. We went shopping at The Riverwoods and bought some super cute clothes. We watched You've Got Mail and played our favorite game, Pandemic. We got frosties and french fries from Wendy's and went for a drive. On Saturday I had breakfast at Magleby's Fresh with Kelsey's little family and then took Kelsey and Grant to the airport in the afternoon. The good news is I am planning a visit to Bellingham, Washington to visit just as soon as I graduate. Thank heavens!

As we were driving to the airport Kelsey pointed out that it's weird that leaving was so hard when it was exactly what she wanted. The dream was always to come to BYU, graduate, possibly get married and then leave. These goodbyes happened because my friends are getting exactly what they have wanted and worked for, but they were hard goodbyes nonetheless. I'm excited to move on to the next phase of my life, graduating and moving on to PA school eventually is exactly what I want, but I know that my last days being at BYU and living in Provo will be bittersweet for me as well. I have so many good memories and I have found so many people I love here.

Don't you hate goodbyes? I always think saying goodbye is one of the hardest things we have to do in life. Sometimes we say goodbye because we are moving on and there is the excitement of starting over and doing something new. But despite the excitement of great things to come I always hate saying goodbye.

"You get a strange feeling when you're about to leave a place. Like you'll not only miss the people you love but you'll miss the person that you are now at this time and this place, because you'll never be this way ever again."

- Azar Nafisi, Reading Lolita in Tehran