happy place

I went to Barnes and Noble tonight and as I wandered through the aisles of books I thought, 'Ah, this is my happy place." There are few things that make me happier than a book store. And I love a good used book store. Call me crazy, but I like the old, dusty smell of books that have been enjoyed and passed on. The only downfall of my happy place being book stores is the difficulty I have in maintaining self control and not buying out the store. I had to really stop myself from buying the nearly 10 books that I carried around a while. When I walk into a bookstore I feel a wash of peace and satisfaction. I realized tonight that I have other happy places as well. And isn't it nice to have happy places? I love to be at the hospital. I'm at work at the hospital right now, in fact, and it is really a happy place for me. {What a pleasure to have my work place be a happy place for me!} The temple is the best place to really feel peace, and it is nice to be able to have a temple so close. I love to be in my car and just drive. The serenity that I feel when I'm just driving is something I believe to be a primary component of the places that make me happy. I love to be anywhere that I feel content and peaceful, anywhere that is beautiful, where I can be calm and read or reflect or talk with a friend. A happy place is somewhere you can escape from the stresses of life and be encircled in peace. Everyone needs at least one happy place, don't you think?

beauty

"She had a way of seeing the beauty in others, 

even, and perhaps most especially, 

when that person couldn't see it in themselves."

- J.K. Rowling {Lupin talking about Lily Potter)

I think, more than anything else, this is the type of person that I want to be- a person who can see the beauty in the world, and especially the beauty in people. 

shiny happy people

I've been feeling a little dark and twisty lately. Things have been pretty rough, to say the least, so I sometimes feel justified in those negative feelings. But the thing is, I do not want to be dark and twisty; I want to be bright and shiny. So I'm working on that. In light of my trying to be a shiny happy person, I think it is time to reflect on some happy things.  So here are some things that make me happy this week:

- Hanging out with Kelsey and cuddling baby G. There's nothing like a little baby therapy, and Grant is the cutest baby in the world. I love that I get to see Kelsey and talk in the late hours of the night.

- Thai food and awesome friends. And stripes. Becky picked up Thai food for dinner on Monday night. Love me some green curry. AND she bought me a cute striped shirt from H&M. Awesomeness.

- Music! The new Ingrid CD came out this week and I am lovin it!

- Grey's Anatomy dermatology episode. Becky and I watched this late one night. I love it. A lot. Also, I make a LOT of Grey's references on my blog.

- Anticipating my new job! I got a job as a patient care assistant at Utah Valley and I am so excited to start next week. Is it weird that I kind of love hospitals? Hospitals feel safe to me. 

- Despite my most recent complaining post, this guy I'm dating is a champ. He is still hugely confusing,  but I just think he is great. Do you want to hear some things I like about him? Yeah? Ok! He always makes me laugh. In April he will officially be an officer in the Marine Corps, and we al love a man in uniform {especially the Marines uniform, because Marines are the best}. He says that he doesn't "blow smoke"- when he says something you know he really means it and I love that. His compliments really feel like compliments because they are so sincere. He has a strong testimony of the Savior and he shares that with me. I know he really respects me and he is very supportive and he gives amazing advice. Our friendship comes first. He is SO clueless and confused about dating, which kind of drives me crazy, but I find it quite endearing at the same time. So anyway, it's possible that we could break up at any time {who knows!}, but I just think he's great and he probably couldn't do anything to change that. He has definitely raised the bar for future relationships. 

- Family. It is so great how much support I get from my family. I'm really thankful that families are forever. 

- Simple pleasures. Sometimes it is funny the little things that make me so happy. I've said it before and I'll say it again: mint waxed floss never ceases to bring a smile to my face. Why do I love it so much? I don't have the slightest idea. 

- Baking. Baking makes me happy. Last week I made a chocolate cake. This week I made some beautiful banana muffins. Lovely. 

There are certainly many other things that make me happy, but these are some highlights. And when I look at this list, the bad things don't seem quite so bad. I am on my way to being a shiny happy person, I tell you! Life will never ever be perfect, but you get to choose what you do with the imperfections. And as Jillian Michaels says in her Ripped in 30 video, "Perfection sucks! Perfection is boring!"

Also, another Grey's Anatomy reference:

"Smooth rides make for boring stories. 

A little calamity, that's worth talking about."

passive-aggressiva

"There is a land called Passive-Aggressiva, and I am their queen."
I have really been earning my place on the throne of this land called Passive-Aggressiva in the past few days. I am their queen. Unfortunately, men are generally too dense to be able to read the body language or hear that little passive aggressive tone in your voice. Men.* You can't live with 'em, you can't kill 'em. I've said it before and I'll say it again: dating ruins your life. Over the past 6 weeks or so while everyone else has been blogging about the lovely events of 2011, their Christmas vacations, and their resolutions for the new year I have been . . . dating. Dating is an interesting experience for me, an experience that I rarely participate in and generally do not enjoy. This dating experiment, however, was going splendidly until last week. So here I am, dealing with growing frustration, trying to decide how to approach this first fight or possible end of our relationship. All the while he seems completely clueless. I came home angry Friday night. My anger grew into a scary monster on Saturday, so Becky and I went for a nice late-night drive with loud music to make everything better. Yesterday I was feeling somewhat recovered and ready to calmly address the issue today. But alas, today the anger has been rekindled and I am back on the throne of Passive-Aggressiva because I am afraid of the angry and potentially mean things I may say if I actually attempt to discuss this. Apparently I need some lessons in dealing with conflict.

Dating is the worst. I honestly don't know how anyone ever gets married.

On the bright side,
this makes me really happy:

and I'm a little obsessed with this song: {Youth, by Daughter}

and Ingrid's new album comes out next week. Joy!


*This should probably say "Men I date." I actually think men are great. My friends have husbands that are great. My dad is wonderful. My brothers are the best guys around. But the ones I tend to date . . . yikes!

favorite childhood books

When I saw Allison's post of her top ten childhood favorites, I had to join in and share my favorites. I love children's books. I remember so many books that I loved as a child and still love today. Narrowing the list down to ten may be a little difficult, but here are some of my favorites.

1. Nancy Drew by Carolyn Keene. Around fourth to fifth grade I was obsessed with Nancy Drew. I think I have something like 30 of them on my book shelf at home. I wanted a blue mustang convertible just like Nancy. I recently learned that Carolyn Keene is a pseudonym and the books were actually written by lots of different people.

2. The Little Engine That Could by Watty Piper (pseudonym). I loved this book growing up and I love it still. The popularity of this one at my house probably had to do with the fact that my brother was really into trains. I picked this one to give to Kelsey for her baby boy.

3. The Pain and The Great One by Judy Blume. This is a great book for big sisters with little brothers. I remember reading it when I was eight and my brother was six, the same ages of the brother and sister in the book. The story of The Great One is told by the little brother about his sister who says his sister things she is so great and the story of The Pain is told by the sister about how her little brother is such a pain, but there are some very sweet moments. I loved it.

4. Cinder Edna by Ellen Jackson. This book is a must-have for all little girls. Princess stories are great and all, but they don't really send good messages. Cinder Edna is Cinderella's neighbor. She works hard and takes care of herself rather than moping around in the cinders. She doesn't wait around for a fairy godmother to solve her problems- she puts a dress on layaway and rides the bus to the ball. She ends up falling in love at the ball and having a lovely happy relationship with Prince Charming's younger brother. All this is in contrast to the boring, self-centered, and shallow relationship that we see with Cinderella and Prince Charming. This book is clever and fun with great pictures and a great story for little girls.

5. The Polar Express by Chris Van Allsburg. This is one of my favorite Christmas books. Lovely illustration, the ride to the North Pole, Santa, the bell from the reindeer that you can only hear as long as you believe. Beautiful, magical, wonderful.

6. Goodnight Moon by Margaret Wise Brown. I bought this book in Hebrew when I was in Jerusalem because I just love it. It's a great bedtime book and I love the pictures. And the colors. It's sweet and simple.

7. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone  by J.K. Rowling. I love all of the Harry Potter books, but the first one is probably still my favorite just because it was the first and the beginning of this new world. I don't remember how old I was when I first read this, but it was beautiful and I loved it. I was a seriously over-achieving child and I connected with Hermione from the second that I met her in this book. It's hard to describe the huge part that the Harry Potter books played in my childhood.

8. Anthem by Ayn Rand. Definitely not a children's book, but a part of my childhood, Anthem is still one of my favorite books. I read it for the first time in fourth grade and I have read it many times since. I just love it. It's only about 100 pages and I think it is really an interesting story with a great message about the value of individuals. Everyone should read it.

9. The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. I read these books with my dad growing up. I love the characters, the stories, and the allegory of Christ. C.S. Lewis is fabulous and I will definitely read these with my children. They have great imagination and teach good lessons through exciting stories.

10. Where the Red Fern Grows by Wilson Rawls. I read this book in my fifth grade language class and I think it may have been the first time a book made me cry. It may also be the source of my love for dogs. It's a sweet story about love and loss for this boy and his dogs.


Honorable Mentions:
Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak
Alexander, and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by Judith Viorst
Love You Forever by Robert Munsch
American Girl Addy books.
Chicka Chicka Boom Boom by Bill Martin, Jr.
Blueberries for Sal by Robert McCloskey
Basically anything by Dr. Seuss, especially Oh the Places You'll Go and Dr. Seuss's ABC: An Amazing Alphabet Book